Look A Little Deeper
by Sgt.Peppers-lonely-hearts-club
Summary: Bella's world came carashing down at 14 when she was diagnosed with lukaemia. When she moves to Forks to live with her estranged father she soon realises solace doesnt just come in the form of sex, drugs and music but in the form of the enigmatic Edward
1. Prologue

A/N: okay this is the first fanfic I've written so please go easy on me thanks!!

Disclaimer: All belongs to S.M. Inspired a little bit by my sister's keeper

Prologue:

Running Up That Hill

BPOV

It happened when I was fourteen they diagnosed it. Leukaemia. They didn't think I would survive, they said they didn't catch in time. Mom always said that I just bruised easily. I partially blame her for this, could she not read the signs? But I don't hate her; it's hard on her losing her only child in matter of years it bothered her that she would outlive me. It was on my last stay in hospital she decided to have transferred to one of the best oncology units in the country, the Port Angeles Grace Memorial Hospital. Luckily enough for me I'll be staying with my long-lost father Charlie. He really isn't long-lost he just never was around. He called a few times when found out about it, but talking to him was kinda awkward I knew nothing about him and he only pitied me 'cause of the leukaemia, everyone did and I hated it. I'm nearly eighteen now but I feel like a four year old, mom just believes I can't do anything for myself anymore that I have to have round the clock supervision and I can't handle it, I never really could. Even when I was fourteen, before the diagnosis, I was always sneaking out, smoking, partying, you name it I did it, I still do it.

Renee never really cared much back then about the sneaking out but it was the weed and drinking she went mad about, she doesn't go crazy over the weed now, I say its for medicinal aid It does help it burns the numbness of the situation out and lets me relax.

To feel normal is what I want more than anything, I hate when people say they understand when they have no clue at all

My last hospital visit was almost seven months ago, mom thinks this is good I'm just waiting for the inevitable to happen it always does.

The only thing that keeps me sane is my iPod the sounds of rock is what keeps my soul alive when the rest of me is dying.

A/N: Okay I know a little bit depressing but it will get a little lighter soon okay!!


	2. Chapter 1

_Chapter 1: __The Messenger_

_Song : The Messenger – Linkin Park_

_When you've suffered enough  
And your spirit is breaking  
Your growing desperate from the fight_

BPOV:

I've been living at Charlie's for a week and four days, not that I'm counting. He's quiet, different, better. He doesn't pester me about vitamin tablets, mineral supplements. He's just there, floating in the background, ready to help when needed. I like it.

The house is warm and homely not sterile and cold. When I arrived I was greeted with my first car a bright purple bug. I don't think I've smiled as much as I did when I saw it. It was perfect.

Currently I'm on my way to the hospital in Port Angeles to get my latest diagnosis.

I sat patiently in the waiting room. It was ten minutes before I saw the door opening and a handsome blonde haired man stepped out. He looked like the guys off of GQ.

"Sorry for keeping you waiting Ms. Swan, I'm Dr. Cullen; follow me to my office please." He said looking at me with his baby blue eyes.

I followed him to a cream room and sat down opposite him at an expensive looking mahogany table.

"Okay, basically you have acute myeloid leukaemia, which you know, I have extremely good news for you, and before your last bout of chemo six months ago your leukemic cells were showing at five percent, from reading you latest results they have dropped to zero. You seem to be in remission but you have a moderate chance of relapsing.

I was speechless forget about getting Betty the bug. This was the happiest day of my life. Remission. I didn't care that I could relapse it was the fact that I could finally be normal for some space of time.

Doctor Cullen said I had a forty-six percent chance of relapsing in the first year. He scheduled check-ups and blood tests for every two months.

My sepulchral, melancholic mood has been lifted replaced by sanguinity.

I drove along the highway in a euphoric haze, when I saw a young girl about my age trying to change the tyre of her canary yellow Porsche 911. I pulled Betty over and got out.

"Hey, do you need help" I shouted over the thundering rain. The girl turned to look at me and ran over.

"Oh my god! Thank you so much for stopping my tyre went flat but I have no idea how to change it, and I have no cell coverage at all." She looked absolutely soaked from head to toe. She had long short, spiky, inky black hair, elfin features and couldn't have been more than five foot.

"Here you can use my cell." I handed my iphone over to her and watched as she quickly dialled a number.

"Hey Em, my tyres flat and I have no idea how to change it, my cell has no coverage at all.

What?

Oh a girl stopped to give me a hand.

Right. Okay." With her conversation swiftly over she handed me back my phone and turned to me.

"Hi, I'm Alice." She stuck out her small hand which I quickly took.

"Bella. Do you need a ride anywhere?" I asked her.

"Yeah, I rang my brother there but he and his girlfriend, her brother and my other brother are currently fifty miles from here camping up in the mountains. They always do this every summer before school starts. They've been doing this since the first grade with my mom and dad way before Emmett and Rosalie got together." Her words came out so fast I was almost unsure of what she had said.

"So how come your not up there with them?" I asked intrigued by the little sprite.

"Oh I was on my way up there right now until this happened." She said looking pointedly at the car with hatred.

"Do you want me to give you a ride up there?"

"I couldn't ask you to do that for me."

"I don't mind and right now I'm so happy I would do anything for anyone." I told her with sincere honesty.

"Really? If you don't mind I would hate to miss it. Rosalie's brother is back from his summer exchange program in Texas and he is so hot." Alice started to dramatically fan herself.

"Really I don't. I just have to text my dad to let him know I'll be late home." I quickly sent Charlie a text to say I took a detour to the movie theatre and wouldn't be back for a couple of hours.

I helped Alice load all her luggage into the back a Betty.

"Thanks so much for doing this Bella."

"No problem."

"So, where are you from?"

"Phoenix but I just moved to Forks."

"No way. I live in Forks. After the camping trip we should definitely hangout." She said with bright eyes.

"Yeah that would be cool."

"So are you starting Forks high in September?"

"Yeah, go Spartans go (!)" I exclaimed with mock enthusiasm

"Wait till you meet Lauren Mallory and her sycophantic bitches."

"Let me guess. Bottle blonde. Zero I.Q. Two floating inflatable life preservers strapped to her chest. A dark varnished glow."

"You got her in one" she laughed.

"I've met plenty of Lauren Mallorys before."

The drive was longish. We reached the campsite in an hour and you could make out four dark figures in the distance walking towards the car parking area.

I saw the blonde Amazonian goddess first. She was five foot ten, voluptuous, and had legs that went on for miles. I felt insanely inferior to her as she stood adorned in her designer camping gear like a supermodel while I stood in black jeans, converse and a Radiohead hoodie*.

We got out of Betty and unloaded Alice's luggage.

Alice made her way to the small group whilst holding my hand.

"Guys this is Bella Swan, my saviour" she gestured towards me

"Bella this is Emmett" she pointed towards the giant, herculean man.

"…the blonde girl is Rosalie, the other blonde is her brother Jasper and this tall brooding guy is my other brother Edward."

Edward turned to look at me with his smouldering emerald orbs. He was absolutely gorgeous and knew it.

The all said their hellos and thanked me for getting Alice to them safe and sound. I gave Alice my number and told her to call and made my journey home to civilisation.

AN: *hoodie in Ireland in a jumper with a hood. Firstly thanks to my reviewers secondly my computer has been broken for the past couple of months and I only got it back two days ago so sorry for the delay. I would love a beta if anyone would want to. Bella's condition is still not cured so don't think it'll be a fairytale kinda story where they all lived happily ever after, I hope to make it angsty.


	3. Chapter 2

**AN**: Thanks for the alerts and favourites guys, thanks to babybaby15 for her review.

So with this story I trying to put a playlist together so if you have any suggestions please tell me. Remember if your not 18 you shouldn't be reading this as there will be some sexual scenes later on.

Chapter 3

Song: Dazed and Confused- Led Zeppelin

Third person POV:

Bella woke to the sound of Charlie's cruiser leaving. It was Saturday the twenty sixth of August, school would be starting in less than two weeks and she needed to get some school supplies. She had been in all AP (I think that's what they're called) classes in Phoenix, so Forks High should be a breeze. She decided to explore the forest behind her house, boredom had finally set in, she threw on her chucks and grabbed her cigarettes, book and iPod.

She remembered the look on Charlie's face last night when she told him the good news.

_Flashback:_

_Bella walked through the front door, a large smile still plastered on her face. She turned into the sitting room to see Charlie watching 'SportsCenter'._

"_Hey Bells, what's put that smile on your face?" he asked with curiosity etched across his face, he hadn't seen his daughter offer a smile like that before._

"_I got great news from the hospital…I'm in remission." She watched as relief and happiness spread across the slightly wrinkled plains of his face. Her jumped up suddenly and ran end embraced her in tight loving bear hug._

"_God, Bells I hoped for this day so much… I… I can't believe it…you-…your mom is gonna be so delighted. I think this calls for a celebration." She could see his eyes welling up, she had never seen Charlie show this much emotion._

_Charlie couldn't believe it for so long he thought he be burying his daughter before her twentieth birthday, he had hoped but he knew he had to be realistic; Renee with her surrealist attitude wouldn't listen to anyone when they told her the survival rate. _

_The day he found out was heartbreaking, he never for once thought his own child would have cancer let alone could die._

"_I think I'll go to the store and get ice cream, I haven't had it in ages." Bella told him. Thinking back to all the steamed, organic food she was made to eat._

_End Flashback._

She walked for about an hour and came across a large clearing which lead to a small meadow. She took a seat beside a large willow tree, turn on her iPod and open a copy of "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas".

She had lost track of time and was suddenly interrupted by vibrations on thigh coming from her cell.

She briefly looked at the screen and saw that it was Alice. She hadn't heard from her since they met two days ago.

"Hi"

"Hey Bella, I'm so glad I caught, I was wondering if you wanted to hangout now that the camping trip is over?"

"Sure. When?"

"How bout in an hour we can go shopping in Port Angeles or you can come over you pick." Bella wasn't really in the mood for shopping, she was hoping Alice wouldn't mind hanging around her house.

"Is it okay we hang round yours?"

"Sure, where are you right I can come pick you up, the house is hard to find if you don't know where your going, the amount of times my Manolo Blahniks got shipped over to Mrs. Cope, thank god she doesn't have the same size foot as me or she would've kept them."

"I'm in the forest right now but you can come pick me up in an hour, I have to take a quick shower."

"Sure, I can't wait."

With that, Bella carefully trekked home.

After her shower she heard a loud rumbling coming from outside. She looked out to see a 1968 Shelby Mustang. Alice was sitting in the front passenger seat and her brother Edward was sitting in the driver position. Bella was drooling; she had developed a love for cars after spending time with Renee's brother Dave, a mechanic, as a kid.

Alice quickly hopped out and ran to Bella, grabbing her in a tight hug.

Bella had wondered what had happened to Alice's car.

"Where's your car?"

"Oh, Dad sold it for me, I never really liked it, he is buying me BMW soon."

"Awesome, I'll follow you with Betty."

"Kay no problem."

Bella hopped into her beloved bug and followed them until they turned up to the Cullen house. Bella thought house was a little insulting to the fine mansion that was laid before her eyes, set in the heart of the forest; with no nearby neighbours for miles it was seclusion at its best.

She watched as Edward gracefully got out of the car, ray bans quickly folded and put away, she noticed how his black tight jeans snugly fitted around his ass.

When she and Alice entered the mansion they were greeted by a lovely looking woman, she looked to be in her early forties.

"Hello dear, you must be Bella; I'm Esmé, Alice's mother. Alice can't stop talking about her 'saviour'" she said to Bella using air quotes.

"It wasn't that much I just gave her a ride."

Alice swiftly got Bella by the hand and dragged her upstairs. The entered a large baby blue and brown bedroom.

BPOV

"Welcome to my humble abode." Alice said in a mock French accent.

"Your house is awesome."

"Thanks mom is an interior designer, she specialises in restoring old buildings."

"What about your dad?"

"He's doctor at the Hospital in Port Angeles, you should meet him if you stay for dinner, please stay for dinner?" she pleaded with Bella with puppy dog eyes.

"Sure, why not."

"Tell me how the camping trip went."

"Oh God Bella I feel like such a fool. " Alice told her with sad eyes.

"Why? It couldn't have been that bad you know them all really well."

"Jasper and me have known each other yes since we were little, but we've never been close it was always kind of Edward and Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie, I've always been kind of the fifth wheel. When you left me at the camp site, we all made our way to the fire and sat around it. I asked Jasper how Texas went you know? He told me he had met the most amazing girl ever, beautiful, smart, funny, and exotic. He started going on about her all night, Emmett was like 'I bet she had a huge rack' and Jasper started going all red, he's the kind of guy that won't give sordid details, but the blush told it all. Bella look at me I have no boobs what so ever. I look like a prepubescent boy. "

You know hoe they say never to judge a book by its cover well it was so true right then. When I first met Alice I thought she was so confident and beautiful and embraced it, but then after her pouring her heart out I realised that she was the same as me. She had hang ups about her body, her confidence waivered from time to time,

I had never thought that Alice couldn't be confident.

"Alice Jasper is a fool not to like you, your hot and believe me, when I lived in Phoenix I went through a bisexual phase and you would've been totally my type."

It was true even thought I had cancer I still could have fun. Liv my first girlfriend looked similar to Alice. After sharing that tidbit of information I did not expect Alice to kiss me.

She grabbed my face and pulled me to her. Her lips gently parted and she tasted like sugar and honey. She reached her hands up to cup my breasts, her fingers tugging my nipple piercings through the fabric. She quickly lifted my top off and pulled my bra down. I quickly straddled her and made short work of her clothes there she lay her pussy glistening in the light, I looked up at her.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes" she moaned at me

Just as I was about to move my head down we heard a sharp intake of breath and we turned to face…..

AN: My first lemon! Whoop! Go easy on me. Hehehe little cliffie for you. review who you want to catch them. Remember you have to be 18 to read this.


End file.
